


Once Bitten, Twice Shy

by undieshogun



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Fire Emblem Fates: Revelation Spoilers, M/M, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-08
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-07 06:40:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8787589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undieshogun/pseuds/undieshogun
Summary: On his nineteenth birthday, Takumi meets Niles, a Nohrian outlaw who works for Hoshido as a spy, and takes him in as his retainer at Ryoma's request. Niles spends months earning Takumi's trust (and eventually, his affection)--only to betray him at a crucial moment during the Nohrian-Hoshidan war. When Corrin's union of both armies brings them back together, Takumi is unwilling to forgive Niles for what he's done, and Niles finds himself scrambling to pick up the broken pieces of what they once had.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um.....i have no idea where this came from and i have...only a shadow of an idea of where it's going to go. i always try my best not to post multi-chapter/long fics until i'm finished with them (hence why there never any long fics being published here tbh) but i actually have a publishing goal to reach at the end of this year so i'm kind of just going for it....so yes. i am back at it again with zerokumi and this time it's gonna be a multi-chapter work. buckle in and ENJOY!!

They met on Takumi’s nineteenth birthday. 

“He’s Nohrian,” was the first thing Takumi noticed about him. 

It wasn’t obvious at first, with his dark skin and snowy hair, but the outlaw’s outfit he wore and the steel bow he carried were both clearly of Nohrian make. 

“He grew up in Nohr, yes,” said Ryoma. “But he’s been working undercover as a Hoshidan agent under my command for nearly a year now.” 

“He’s been spying for you?” asked Takumi. He looked back down at the outlaw, who kept his head bowed. He didn’t look very much like Ryoma’s other spies, who were slick and sharp-eyed. If anything, this one seemed rather shabby in comparison. “So why are you introducing him to me?” 

“I figured it was about time you took in a new retainer,” said Ryoma with a shrug. “Hinata and Oboro are still in training, but you’re at the age where you ought to have a capable, experienced retainer to have your back.” 

Takumi felt his stomach sink. Ryoma was just passing a hand-me-down off on him. “Hinata and Oboro are both capable and experienced. They’ve been with me since we were children.” 

“I don’t doubt that,” said Ryoma. “Still, why don’t you let him swear his oath to you? He’s trustworthy, and it never hurts to have another partner by your side, especially now that you’ll be entering your first battle soon.” 

Ah, so not just a hand-me-down. A babysitter. “I’m not a child,” Takumi said through his teeth. 

“No,” Ryoma replied patiently. “But you are my brother. Let him take the oath, Takumi, if only for my own peace of mind.” 

It was an order disguised as a plea. Takumi could tell by the finality in Ryoma’s voice and the dangerous glint in his eye. Any further argument would make them both unhappy, and nothing good ever came of having two unhappy Hoshidan princes in the same room. 

Takumi sighed. “Fine. What’s your name?” he asked the outlaw. 

The outlaw, who had kept his head bowed and his mouth shut the entire time, finally looked up. 

His single eye, the other hidden beneath an eyepatch, was an electric blue that made Takumi blink twice. He’d never seen eyes of such a vivid color before. 

“It’s an honor to finally meet you, Prince Takumi,” he said, voice flowing deep and smooth off his tongue. Takumi resisted the urge to shudder. 

“Your name?” he prompted. 

The outlaw smiled, mouth splitting into a grin that made Takumi think,  _ If snakes could smile… _

“My name is Niles. From here on out, my life is yours to use as you wish.” 

 

It was a bad idea. Takumi knew this, and not just because Oboro and Hinata had been insisting it was for the past few weeks. From the beginning he’d had plenty of reason to believe so, the foremost of which was that Niles was Nohrian, and Nohrians were thieving scumbags who held no regard or respect for other human beings. 

But Takumi had to admit that for all that it was obvious Niles couldn’t be trusted, he at least knew how to put on a good show. 

He followed every order Takumi gave him to the letter, from the most risky (“Observe and report back on the nearby group of Faceless.”) to the lowest, most mundane and meaningless (“Fetch me the largest watermelon you can find from the fruit market at the far end of the road.”) 

He suffered every snide comment and casual insult quietly and calmly, with a serene smile on his face, and never once spoke back to his liege. 

It was, to say the least, truly disturbing on a profound level. 

“I don’t know,” Hinata said one day as they were preparing to skirmish with a Nohrian troop that had strayed a little too close to the border. “You’d think if he was a spy he would have given up by now.” 

Niles had been sent ahead to survey the battleground for anything that might lend insight to their battle strategy. In other words, Takumi had sent him away for being an eyesore. 

“I doubt a Nohrian spy would go to so much trouble to infiltrate the Hoshidan army only to give up so quickly,” said Oboro. “Spy or not, I doubt he has good intentions.” 

Takumi nodded in agreement. In the end, it was always Oboro who made the most sense. 

“Well, maybe this one’s different. He could be worth trusting,” insisted Hinata. 

“And maybe your mother dropped you on your head one too many times when you were little,” retorted Takumi. “Really, what’s gotten into you, Hinata?” 

Hinata shrugged. “I don’t know. I just think maybe you should at least make him feel like he isn’t totally unwanted before he takes a sword in the gut to prove himself for you.” 

Takumi snorted. “As if he would.” 

In hindsight, this was only one of the many things Takumi would regret saying as the next few hours came to pass. 

 

It happened so quickly Takumi didn’t even have time to register what was happening before he was being thrown to the side, landing hard on his knees in the dirt. He snapped his head up, blinking spots out of his eyes, just in time to see the flash of a steel blade and a spray of crimson. 

Body moving automatically, he raised his bow and fired off a shot. 

The Nohrian soldier crumpled around the energy-charged arrow in his chest and dropped to the ground, dead before he could even utter a sound. 

Takumi didn’t stick around to watch the soldier’s head hit the dirt, instead turning around to the one who had fallen before him. 

“Gods, have you lost your mind?” Takumi’s voice cracked with panic as he spoke. “Niles, what were you thinking?” 

Niles smiled weakly. “You’re not hurt, are you?” 

“Shut up,” said Takumi, pressing his hands over the gash in Niles’s side. It wasn’t as serious as it looked, but Takumi didn’t like the way the other's blood flowed thick and uncomfortably warm through his fingers. “You’re an idiot for jumping in front of a blade for someone who wouldn’t miss you for a second. You could have lost your life for nothing.” 

“It’s hard to believe you truly think so little of me when you’ve got such a desperate look in your eyes right now, my prince,” said Niles. 

“I should just let you die right here,” Takumi growled, yet it wasn’t a second later that he raised his head and called across the battlefield, “ _ Sakura! _ ” 

Sakura was there in an instant, hefting her staff up and holding it over the wound. The sound of bells chiming filled the air around them. 

“There’s no need to fuss over a lowly soldier such as myself, Lady Sakura,” said Niles with a deliberate, indecipherable smile. 

To Sakura’s credit, she didn’t stutter as she usually did when she replied, “My brother and I value the lives of all Hoshidan soldiers equally.” 

“You honor me with your conviction, Princess.” 

Sakura hesitated at that, glancing up at Takumi. 

Takumi rolled his eyes. “Don’t talk to him, Sakura. It’s never worth the energy.” 

Sakura nodded, still looking uncertain as she lowered her staff. “The wound was deep, but I've managed to close it for now. I would send him to infirmary after this battle just to be safe, though.” 

“Fine,” said Takumi. “Thanks, Sakura.” 

Sakura inclined her head, not looking at Niles, then scurried away to attend to the other soldiers. 

“My thanks, Lord Takumi,” said Niles. 

“Save it. Pick up your bow and get back out there,” huffed Takumi. As he turned around, he paused. “One more thing, actually.”

“Anything.”

“If you ever put your hands on me again, I’ll cut them off myself.” 

 

It was later that night that Niles came to find him in his tent, while he was reviewing the battle report he’d written to send to Ryoma. 

“My Lord? Do you think you could spare a minute?” 

“Mm,” Takumi replied absently. After a few seconds of no response, he remembered belatedly that he’d once forbidden Niles from entering his tent without express permission.  “Give me a second.” 

Takumi tucked the report into an envelope and sealed it, then called Niles in. 

Niles entered and lowered himself onto one knee in a typical Hoshidan show of respect towards royalty.  Takumi was fairly certain he would never get used to seeing a man in Nohrian uniform bowing to him. 

He turned the envelope over and carefully penned Ryoma’s name onto the front. 

Niles waited at his side, head lowered. 

It only took a couple of seconds for the silence to settle into tangible awkwardness in the air between them. 

“How’s your wound?” Takumi asked as he continued writing, signing his name in the bottom corner of the envelope. 

“I sought treatment in the infirmary after the battle as you ordered. It’s fine now,” Niles said. “Thank you for your concern.” 

“Well, if you’re feeling fine then shouldn’t you be taking inventory in the armory?” 

“I’ve already finished,” said Niles. “I’ve gotten rather used to it, since I find myself there fairly often.” 

“Mm, Oboro likes to give you her shifts,” said Takumi non-committally. “It is a pretty boring job.” 

“...Right.” 

“So? What did you want to talk about?” said Takumi, setting the report down and finally turning to look at Niles. “Unless that was it just now.” 

Niles seemed to hesitate for a moment before speaking. “You’re never going to accept me as your retainer.” 

Takumi raised eyebrow. “And the sky is blue. Is that really all you came to say?” 

"...No."

Takumi felt the edges of his patience fraying with irritation. Gods, but Niles was good at wasting his time. "Then spit it out and get out of my way. I have things to do."

Niles raised his head to meet his eyes. "I want to know how I can gain your trust."

Takumi's own eye twitched as their gazes connected, and he couldn't help but glance away. In truth, what Takumi found most unsettling about Niles was not his snake-like smile or his sly demeanor, but rather his single blue eye. It reminded Takumi of something different every time he looked at it (the sea, the sky, the sharp gleam of the rare sapphire gems that he sometimes saw the nobles in court wearing) and in that sense it gave Takumi the feeling that Niles himself might be capable of being so many different things as well. For no matter what his expression, his actions, or his words said about him, his eyes always held something unreadable and, consequently, dangerous.

"Fine. Here's how you can gain my trust," Takumi relented. He leaned forward and lowered his voice, like he was about to share an important secret. "The next time you stand between me and an enemy soldier, make sure their blade runs you through properly."

It was only for a fleeting moment, but Takumi noticed the way Niles's eye widened fractionally and felt a vague sense of accomplishment.

But when Niles replied, it was with the same infuriating serenity that he always spoke with. "If I have to give my life to be worth something to you, then I will."

Takumi's mouth twisted into a grimace. "As if a Nohrian would ever die for a Hoshidan. What makes you so different from the rest of them, anyway?"

"Well, for starters, I'm here, aren't I?" Niles asked, and if Takumi hadn't been looking him in the eye, he might have fallen for the false warmth in his smile.

 

"He has to give up eventually, doesn't he?" Takumi shoved his leather chest plate up over his head and tossed it onto his futon. "I mean, I've never given him the chance to gather any sort of sensitive information, and I'm pretty sure he can tell I'm never going to."

Sakura wordlessly picked the chest plate up and laid it carefully on top of his trunk instead. Takumi felt a little bad, and when he took off his shirt he was more careful about folding it and placing it at the foot of his futon.

"Let me see," Sakura said, putting her hands on his shoulders to turn him around, and he twitched slightly at the sensation. When had she grown so many callouses on her hands?

"It's nothing worth wasting your energy on," he said, shrugging his shoulders experimentally. Dull pain radiated from the area just between his shoulder blades, but it was nothing he couldn't tolerate while it healed naturally, and it definitely wasn't the worst he'd suffered in a battle. It had come as a surprise, to be sure. Since the conversation in Takumi's tent a couple days ago, Niles had taken to redoubling his efforts in throwing himself in front of any attack meant for Takumi. He had been a little off his game today, though, movements seeming somewhat slower than they usually were--

Not that Takumi had been relying on him.

"Don't be silly," Sakura said, pulling her festal out and already starting the healing spell.

Warmth spilled down Takumi's back before coiling into a liquid, stinging heat against the bruise between his shoulder blades that made him want to reach back and itch at his skin. He kept his hands tucked at his sides, however, as Sakura continued repairing his wound, and his thoughts wandered back to the conversation he'd started earlier.

"I mean, if he was here for information, wouldn't he have stayed with Ryoma rather than let him toss him off to me?" Takumi said abruptly, continuing where he'd left off. "It doesn't make any sense."

From behind him, Sakura let out a small sigh that he wouldn't even have noticed if he hadn't felt the huff of breath against his back.

"Takumi...maybe he's just not a spy."

"Don't be silly," Takumi muttered, echoing his sister's earlier words. "Regardless of what anyone thinks he is or isn't, at the very least I know his presence here is bound to bring something horrible upon us eventually."

The warmth receded as Sakura lowered her staff. "You don't even know anything about him except that he's been completely loyal to you."

"Yeah, but I know he's Nohrian." Takumi snatched his shirt up and pulled it over his head, then rolled his shoulders a few times. The pain was gone, but the newly mended muscles would be a bit tight for the next hour or so. "If we were in opposite positions, I would have already killed him in his sleep by now."

"He's not you."

"No. He's scum, and the sooner he falls into a ditch or catches a stray arrow, the better I'll be able to sleep at night."

"Then why haven't you executed him yourself?"

Takumi paused at that, unprepared to give an answer.

Sakura came around to face Takumi, clutching her festal to her chest like a shield. She always did that when she was about to speak her mind.

"You care about him, don't you? At least as a retainer," she said.

Takumi scoffed. "Are you kidding me?"

"Spy or not, you can't deny that he's sacrificed a lot for you already," said Sakura. "It wouldn't feel right to just let him die in your service, would it?"

An unpleasant weight settled in Takumi's stomach. "Sakura--"

"He may be Nohrian, but he's a human being as well. If there's even a slight possibility that he might be genuinely loyal to you, you would never forgive yourself if--"

"Okay!" Takumi let out a groan and dragged a hand over his face. "Fine, you're right. He's a dirtbag and a pain in my neck, but he doesn't actually deserve to die on a simple possibility, all right? Is that what you wanted to hear?"

Sakura shrugged and rocked back on her heels. "You said it, not me."

Takumi scowled. "I'm not going to do anything until I have evidence, but I'm still certain he's a spy."

"I think it's smart to be careful," said Sakura.

It wasn't necessarily an agreement, but he would take it for now.

Takumi frowned. "Where is he, anyway? Hinata and Oboro have already turned in their battle reports. He still owes me one."

Sakura blinked. "I haven't seen him."

"And just when we were talking about how he was a good retainer," Takumi muttered, but as he turned to head out of his tent and search for Niles, the sound of hasty footsteps from outside made him pause.

"Lord Takumi, an urgent situation has arisen!" reported the messenger who skidded to a stop in front of his tent. "Ah, Lady Sakura! Thank goodness you are here as well."

"What is it?" asked Takumi. The frantic air about the messenger unsettled him.

"I-It's your retainer, My Lord! Niles, he--he's fallen terribly ill!"

Takumi barely gave himself time to register the news before dropping his head into his hand. "You can't be serious."

"Sir--Niles is bedridden and delirious with pain, and none of the priests have been able to determine the source," the messenger reported dutifully, voice edged with urgency. "Lady Sakura..."

"Of course. We'll be there at once," replied Sakura, and then she was ushering both Takumi and the messenger in the direction of the infirmary. "Tell me everything the priests know."

"My Lady, Niles was discovered collapsed in his tent about fifteen minutes ago and was promptly brought to the infirmary. He is sweating profusely and running a high fever but claims that he is cold, is experiencing episodes of convulsive trembling and intense pain, and has vomited once."

"Gods above," Takumi muttered, and for some reason his stomach fluttered. "He looked fine just this morning."

Sakura didn't seem to hear him, expression pinched tight with focus as she mumbled to herself.

"This way, My Lords," the messenger said, leading them into the infirmary.

Niles lay on a cot at the far end of the infirmary, separated from the other patients. Sweat trailed down his face, skin drained of its usual dusky complexion from whatever was afflicting him, and his eye was glassy as his gaze fell on Sakura and Takumi.

"My Lord," he murmured, voice hoarse. Then, he shuddered violently, body seizing as he let out a choked cry of pain.

"Niles!' Takumi just managed to hold himself back from grabbing Niles's arm.

"Takumi, are you absolutely sure he was fine this morning?" Sakura demanded, already reaching forward to hold Niles down and examine him, checking his temperature and then lifting his clothes to search him for any fresh wounds.

Niles twitched under her hold, groaning from the effort it took to hold himself back from throwing her off in the midst of his pain.

Takumi wracked his memory. "He...he seemed a little tired, I suppose, maybe a little less lively than usual. I didn't think much of it--"

"Save your energy," Niles managed to bite out as the episode seemed to peter off. He let out a shaky sigh as he relaxed onto the cot. "I already know what's happening. I've been poisoned."

"What?" Takumi grasped for the words he wanted to say. "Who the hell would go through the trouble of poisoning  _ you? _ "

Niles huffed out a weak laugh. "They weren't trying to poison me." He lifted a trembling hand and, before either of the other two could react, closed it around the scalpel lying on the tray beside him.

Takumi reacted immediately, darting in front of Sakura and pushing her away from the cot. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Very deliberately, Niles turned the scalpel in his fingers and held it out, handle first, towards Sakura. "When I asked this of the priests, none of them would do it."

Sakura gently nudged Takumi aside, ignoring his quiet protests, and returned to Niles's side. She took the scalpel carefully from his hand. "Do what?"

Niles lifted his shirt, revealing the still-healing cut on his side from the battle several days ago. At first glance, it looked completely normal as far as Takumi could tell. But then--Takumi blinked and almost missed the flash of green that bloomed beneath the scabbing tissue, then disappeared as quickly as it had come.

Sakura came to the realization immediately. "The poison...i-it needs to leave through the same way it came?"

Niles nodded.

"B-but...to reopen such a s-serious wound while it's still recovering..."

Niles smiled at that. "You need only to cut deep enough so as to break skin. The poison will be expelled as long as it has some kind of outlet. Of course, if you feel the  _ urge _ to cut deeper, then by all means--"

Takumi shot Niles a withering glare to silence him, then glanced down and saw the way the scalpel shook in Sakura's hand. "Sakura, I can do it if you don't want to."

Surprisingly, Sakura shook her head. "I can do it," she said, eyes bright with resolve as she tightened her grip on the scalpel.

"Excellent," said Niles, sounding a lot more excited than he looked. "Now, the best time to make the incision would be when one of those excruciatingly painful episodes I've been having resurfaces, as that would be when the majority of the poison is--ah!"

Niles pitched forward, body jerking as his wound once again flushed green.

"Hold him down!" Sakura ordered, and Takumi scrambled to comply, planting his hands firmly on Niles's chest and pressing him down against the cot.

Sakura was lightning quick and at the same time utterly precise--she made the incision with a flick of her wrist and immediately a thick, unearthly green fluid started to spill out of the cut.

Niles gasped like he'd been drowning--and at that moment Takumi realized he could feel the other's racing heartbeat against the palm of his hand, a frantic  _ tha-thump _ that gradually slowed into something steadier and more rhythmic as Niles fell back against the cot with an exhausted, relieved smile.

Sakura examined the rag she had used to wipe the poison up, scowling down at the viscous material. Takumi looked down and realized she had already healed the incision.

"My Lord," Niles prompted, voice strained. "While I appreciate your forwardness, I'm having a little trouble breathing under your...administrations." He glanced down, and Takumi realized with a jolt that he still had his hands pressed firmly against the other's chest.   


He yanked them back like he'd been burned. "Sorry," he said, cheeks flushing with heat. 

Niles merely gave him a vague, dazed smile. Takumi could tell he was fighting to stay awake. "That poison doesn't occur naturally in this world," Niles said, gaze moving to Sakura and the rag in her hand.

"Was it...created in Nohr?" Sakura asked.

"By the Nohrian court mages, yes," said Niles. "It's a slow-acting poison that enters the body through open wounds and gets sealed in when the wound is healed. It was originally designed for assassination, but these days it's mostly used by the army to make death extremely painful for enemy soldiers. It used to be one of my favorites, but that was before I found myself on the receiving end."

"I-I can't be entirely sure of what to expect from here, but if we've managed to extract all the poison, th-then I think you'll be able to recover in the next couple of days," said Sakura.

"Thank you, Lady Sakura," said Niles. He closed his eye. "I owe you this worthless life of mine."

"Oh, please," Takumi muttered, rolling his eyes. "Do you ever get tired of using that line?"

But Niles didn't reply, and when Takumi looked down at him he realized the other was already asleep, chest rising and falling as he took in shallow, even breaths.

Takumi turned to Sakura. "Is he going to be all right?"

Sakura frowned slightly. "If that was all of the poison, then he should be. I don't think I've ever seen it before though, so I really can't be entirely certain. I'll keep an eye on him as he recovers."

"You don't have to," said Takumi quickly. "I know you have better things to do. He's my responsibility."

"Are you sure?" Sakura asked, though she was already looking up at him with a hopeful gleam in her eye.

"Yes, I'm sure," Takumi replied flatly. "I'll let you know if anything comes up."

Sakura nodded in agreement.

Takumi watched as she folded the rag in her hand carefully. "What are you going to do with that?"

"I think I'll take it to the apothecary and see if we can create an antidote for this poison, in case it turns up again," said Sakura.

Takumi scowled. "It should never have turned up in the first place. These battles we've been having the past couple of weeks--they've all been inside the border. Those enemy soldiers weren't supposed to have gotten through the barrier."

"The barrier is weakening," Sakura agreed. "I'm sure Ryoma's already figured it out as well."

"Mother can't keep renewing it forever. It takes too much out of her," said Takumi. "If Nohr keeps on attacking like this, we'll soon have an all-out war on our hands."

Sakura looked down at the Niles and then up at Takumi, her expression falling into one of deep thought. "Isn't that what we've been training for all this time?"

 

The march back towards Shirasagi seemed much longer than the march towards the border had been, though that probably had to do with the soldiers' exhausted bodies--heavy feet and heavier hearts after a battle, as it was often said.

Nobody in the troop had expected to fight two battles over the course of four days, and with Nohrian soldiers, no less. The most they had been expecting was a couple of skirmishes here and there with the Faceless. It hadn't escaped anyone's notice what it meant that the soldiers had gotten through a weak point in the barrier.

On the final night of the march, the troop set up camp about a city away from the capital as the sun sank below the mountains to the west.

As the last of the sun's warm light faded to shadows, Takumi ducked away from the camp to carry out some shooting practice on a nearby crop of trees.

The Fujin Yumi was heavy in his hands today, weighing his arms down with a burning ache every time he raised it for a shot. Despite the fact that Takumi had been using it for nearly three years now, there were still some aspects of the sacred weapon that remained a mystery to him. There were days when it was light as a feather, like it had been on the day it had chosen him, glowing warmly against his skin as he picked it up from its old resting place above the throne in Shirasagi. Then, there were days when it was heavy and cold, as if it had decided that it didn't want anything to do with him.

_ Sacred weapons aren't necessarily alive _ , the diviner Orochi had told him once,  _ but that doesn't mean there is no life in them. _

"Just my luck that I end up with a sacred weapon that has a mind of its own," Takumi muttered, lowering the Fujin Yumi after yet another botched shot.

Just as well--he'd known this was going to happen judging from how heavy the Fujin Yumi had been hanging across his back all day. He turned to retrieve the second yumi he'd brought, only to find it had disappeared.

"Looking for something?"

Takumi jolted and snapped his head up, expression pinching into a disgruntled frown when he spotted Niles standing a few feet back, toting the missing yumi with a fox-like grin on his face.

"You should be resting," Takumi said.

Niles shrugged. "I appreciate the concern, My Lord, but I can assure you I'm in excellent shape." He raised the bow, deftly drew an arrow, and shot it off towards the centermost tree that Takumi had been practicing on.

The arrow veered to the side, missing the tree completely and lodging itself into the grass several feet away.

Takumi turned to give Niles an unimpressed stare.

"Hm. I seem to have fallen slightly out of practice over the course of my recovery," said Niles with surprising composure considering how badly he had just embarrassed himself.

"It's not much different from how you usually perform in battle, as far as I can tell," said Takumi flatly. "I don't know if you've ever been made aware of this, but depth perception happens to play a fairly important role in aiming a bow."

Niles merely chuckled, taking the not-so-subtle jab in stride. "There are always ways of getting around one's weaknesses, Prince Takumi. We don't always have to sit back and let our shortcomings cripple us."

Takumi's glance darted towards the Fujin Yumi, where it sat in the grass. He sighed. "What do you want, Niles?"

"Certainly not to trouble you, after everything you've already done for me these past several days," said Niles. His impish smiled fell into a more earnest countenance as he lowered himself on one knee. "I wanted to thank you for saving my life."

Takumi blinked. "Right. You're welcome, I guess," he replied, hating the uneasy feeling that was starting to settle underneath his skin. Was it just a natural reaction for him to be disturbed every time he interacted with Niles? "If that was all, I'm kind of in the middle of something here. You can go now."

Niles didn't move from his spot. "I also wanted to ask you why you did so."

Takumi cringed inwardly. Great, this again. "Would you rather have died?"

"I've already said I would--for you."

"Gods above," Takumi said under his breath. Was he for real? "Look, regardless of what I say or think about you, a retainer is more than just a servant. They're a responsibility. If I let one of my retainers die on my watch, it makes me look bad as a Prince of the nation."

"Is that all?"

Takumi clenched his jaw. Even if Niles wasn't here as a Nohrian spy, there was still a good chance that he'd come simply to make life difficult for Takumi.

"If you think sticking your neck out for me is going to make me trust you, save your energy. I still don't trust you, and I never will," said Takumi.

Niles raised his head to look at Takumi, fixing him with that unreadable stare of his. "Because I'm Nohrian?"

"Yes, because you're Nohrian!" Takumi burst out. "Because it was Nohrians who killed my father and kidnapped my sister, because it was Nohrians who murdered Oboro's parents, and because it was  _ Nohrians _ who started this sport of sending monsters into our lands to destroy our villages and kill our people!"

For the first time since they met, Niles didn't have a reply for Takumi. He merely stared up at him, eye wide and mouth hanging half-open.

Takumi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He hated losing his temper. It didn't do for a prince to show such lack of self-control.

"What are you doing in Hoshido, Niles?" he asked. "You're just an outcast here."

"I've...found purpose here," Niles replied softly.

Takumi shrugged. "Fine. Then just keep doing your job and there won't be any problems." With that, he turned and picked up the Fujin Yumi.

"Your Highness," said Niles, and there was an unusual, almost urgent edge in his voice. "About your sister and Oboro's parents...I didn’t know."

Takumi's grip tightened around the Fujin Yumi. Odd--it had become a little lighter, though the weight was still off-balance. "Well, I don't know anything about you either, so we'll consider it even."

Without waiting for a reply, Takumi tucked the Fujin Yumi against his side and stalked off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here ya go, chapter two!! enjoy !

There was no time for a proper funeral.

Ryoma was there to conduct the beginning of the burial, expression pulled tight with effort as he visibly struggled to maintain his composure. He did not cry. After saying a few short words that all went in through one ear and out the other, he disappeared to mobilize the troops. He didn't even stay to watch the casket get lowered into the grave.

Numbly, Takumi swept his gaze across the crowd of court nobles in attendance. Many of them were crying as they dropped their flowers into the grave, heads lowered and handkerchiefs held up to their faces. He blinked, eyes sore. He was fairly certain he wouldn't be able to cry anymore if he tried.

How long had it been now, since he'd watched Queen Mikoto die in front of him? Hours? Days? Had he slept since then, and had it been in his dreams that he'd kept seeing the same image over and over, of his mother bleeding out in the arms of his sister -- stranger -- traitor -- coward --

A hand on his shoulder made him jump.

"Takumi," Oboro said softly. "We have to go. The army will be moving soon to meet the Nohrian forces at the border."

Takumi didn't turn to look at her, unable to tear his gaze away from Mikoto's gravestone. He could barely read the inscriptions, his eyes were so tired. What good would he be on the battlefield like this?

_ I don't want to go, _ he almost said.

Oboro read his silence easily enough. "The barrier's been broken. Prince Ryoma can't fight the Nohrian troops off without us, My Lord."

Takumi cast one last glance towards the grave.  _ This can't be what you wanted for us, Mother, _ he wanted to scream, never mind that he knew Mikoto would not be able to hear him.

_ Tell me, what would you have me do? _

-:-

Castle Shirasagi felt so empty without its ruler.

Takumi stood in the center of the throne room and stared up at the Throne of the First Dragons. First King Sumeragi, and now Queen Mikoto. Was there anyone who sat on this throne who would not suffer a terrible death?

When Ryoma came to sit on this throne as the new king, would he too be taken from Hoshido in a matter of years, or maybe even months?

For the first time in his life, Takumi felt a distinct, twisted sort of satisfaction that he was not the High Prince of Hoshido. It was a curse, surely, to be destined to rule this kingdom.

Immediately, he felt guilty for having such thoughts. Hoshido was his home; Ryoma was his brother. What was happening now wasn't the fault of some throne. It was Corrin who had ruined everything, bringing that wicked sword into the heart of Hoshido and then betraying her own family without batting an eye.

Takumi clenched his fists until he felt his fingernails dig into the palms of his hands.

_ What family? _

Sakura, of all people, had been the first to disappear after the battle at the border, jumping onto Tsubaki's pegasus without a word and racing after Corrin with her retainers while the rest of the army struggled to their feet after fighting to a standstill with the Nohrians. As soon as they had returned the castle Ryoma, too, had raced off on his own, entrusting the defense of the castle to Hinoka. He hadn't so much as glanced towards Takumi, as if he'd forgotten about him entirely in his haste to leave.

Well, it wouldn't have been the first time.

_ Whatever you want to do, Lord Takumi _ , Hinata and Oboro had told him when they'd noticed his restlessness.  _ We're with you all the way. _

But Takumi hadn't been able to give them an answer. Did it matter at this point what he wanted to do?

Caught up in his thoughts for a moment, Takumi took a half-step towards the throne, then stopped himself. The Throne of the First Dragons revealed one’s true form and revived lost memories, but there was no mystic force in the world that could tell him what the right thing to do was. If it was so powerful, anyone could rule Hoshido.

It wouldn't hurt to try, though. There was bound to be something in the magic of the throne that could help him.

Carefully, like something might happen if he moved too fast, Takumi ascended the steps towards the throne. He'd sat on it before, mostly as a child. King Sumeragi used to make a game out of it--how many royal princes and princesses could he fit onto his throne before they all toppled to the ground in a heap of giggles and mussed hair?

At that time, Takumi had had nothing to hide from the world, and no questions to ask it. The Throne of the First Dragons had been nothing more to him than his father's special seat.

He reached out and ran a hand over the armrest. It was warm, not with body heat, but with magical energy. Of all his siblings, Takumi had always had the lowest affinity for magic. Sakura was already a master of the staff, and even Hinoka and Ryoma had at least some talent in healing, but to Takumi it was all foreign.

But the magic of the throne was familiar. It was gentle but firm in its potence, in the way it radiated energy throughout the entire room. It reminded Takumi of his mother's magic.

Takumi turned and lowered himself onto the throne. Warmth rushed over him, ruffling through his clothes and his hair, and for a split second he caught an image in his mind--

"Lord Takumi?"

Takumi jolted, shooting out of the chair and stumbling down the steps, just barely catching himself on the hardwood floor before he fell on his face.

Embarrassment burned high on his cheeks as he scrambled to his feet, pulling his clothes into place and shoving his hair out of his face only to see Niles standing at the entrance to the throne room.

"What are you doing here?" Takumi snapped, trying not to look like a child caught with his hand in the mochi box.

Niles didn't bother to hide the wide grin that split his face as he leaned against the doorway and crossed his arms like he owned the place. "Trying for a taste of what it's like to be king, my prince?"

Takumi bristled. "Shut up."

"There's nothing wrong with being ambitious," said Niles with a shrug.

Takumi narrowed his eyes. "I know my place. You should learn yours."

At that, Niles folded himself into a sweeping bow. "My place is at your feet, of course. Or under them, if you'd so prefer."

"Yeah, maybe six feet under," Takumi grumbled under his breath. "What do you want, Niles?"

"I just thought I'd check up on you.”

"I don't need you to do that," said Takumi.  _ Not a child _ , he wanted to say. It was what he most often said to Ryoma. He didn't like the idea of having to say it to anyone else either, much less his own retainer.

Niles must have read it in his reply, because he backtracked. "At the very least, you wouldn't mind some company, would you?"

"Don't you have anything better to do than follow me around?"

"It's my job to serve you," Niles said. "And...you haven't really given me any tasks lately."

"That's because there's nothing to do in this damn castle," Takumi muttered. Hinoka had refused to give him responsibility over anything to do with the castle defenses, assuring him that she could handle it herself and that he was safer just staying within the walls.

Of course, he knew she was only protecting him, but it felt an awful lot like he was being sidelined as well, and that was starting to become a familiar feeling.

"The castle courtyards are beautiful around this time of year," Niles said mildly, breaking Takumi out of his thoughts. "I've been in Hoshido for nearly two years now, but I never had the chance to enjoy them before now."

Takumi's expression twisted with reluctance. "There's nothing particularly special about the courtyards. It just happens to be the right season for some of the flowers, that's all."

"Is that not reason enough to give yourself a break and go for a stroll to take your mind off of things?" asked Niles.

"I have too many things to think about to 'take my mind off' anything," Takumi huffed.

"It's worth a try at least, isn't it?" Niles insisted. He stepped aside and gestured out towards the hall.

Takumi glanced back towards the throne. The image he'd seen was fuzzy in his memory now. It had only been there for that split second, after all, but he remembered parts of it.

There had been a fracture, a rift of some sort in the ground. He’d stared down into it and seen nothing but black, and in that fleeting moment he had felt himself bracing himself on his knees, as if to jump into the abyss of his own volition--

Had it been some sort of premonition? Did the throne have that kind of power? Surely it hadn't been a memory, for Takumi had no recollection of such a situation.

Either way, he no longer had any reason to be here. In the end, he hadn't gotten any solid answers, not that he was really expecting to.

He glanced up at Niles, who waited for him at the door, wearing a patient smile that seemed vaguely out of place against his usually smug countenance.

Takumi rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Fine. Let's go," he conceded, and together they walked towards the castle courtyards.

"Perhaps we could invite Hinata and Oboro to join us," Niles suggested as they made their way through the halls side by side.

Takumi didn't have the energy to remind Niles to walk behind him, as he was supposed to do as a royal retainer. "Hinata and Oboro are busy with their own things," he said, and it wasn't a total lie.

The last time Takumi had seen his retainers, Hinata had been practicing some new sword work and Oboro had been catching up on some of the projects she'd started before the war began. These were both things Hinata and Oboro did on their rare days off; this had, essentially, turned into something of an involuntary vacation for them.

The thought made Takumi grind his teeth. Did it matter whether or not he was safe here when being stuck in this castle essentially rendered him useless?

"My Lord, when do you suppose Lady Hinoka will allow you to leave the castle and join the rest of the troops at the border?" Niles asked, as if he'd been reading Takumi's mind.

Gods, Takumi hated it when he did that. "Probably never, if she can help it," he admitted with a scowl.

More than once he'd been tempted to take his retainers and simply leave the castle, either to find his other siblings or help in the skirmishes against the Nohrian troops who were slowly encroaching on Hoshidan land-- _ anything _ he could do to make himself useful.

But Hinoka wasn't just keeping enemies out at her post; the soldiers she'd assigned at the castle's gates had been reluctant to let Takumi leave the castle grounds the first time he'd tried it. They hadn't stopped him, for they had no right, but they'd made it quite clear that they'd intended to report his actions to Hinoka, and Takumi had known that that was not an empty threat.

"Does she not have faith in your capabilities as the second prince?" asked Niles.

For a second, Takumi thought Niles was teasing him again--but his expression was earnest as he frowned down at Takumi, like he was genuinely indignant on his behalf.

Takumi slowed to a stop as the two of them reached the end of the hall that led to the castle courtyards. He put a hand on one of the sliding doors and tapped a finger against the cherrywood absently.

"I don't think anyone does," he said quietly, and without waiting for a reply he pushed the doors open.

Niles was right. The royal courtyards really were beautiful this time of year, albeit in a rather unusual way. The sakura trees that lined the walls surrounding the courtyards were bare, their thin, naked branches exposed to the early fall breeze. But Hoshido's warm, damp weather allowed many of the kingdom's native flowering plants to remain in bloom even at the summer's end, and rows of vibrant blossoms lined the walkways that trailed through and around the courtyards.

What was more, the winter camellias that framed the out-of-season sakura trees had begun blooming early this year, half-formed petals of white and pink fluttering against the gentle wind like they were ready to burst out of their buds.

Takumi strolled into the courtyard, mindful of the sound of Niles's steps following steadily behind him. It was a small blessing, at least, that the other was keeping his mouth shut for now.

In the center of the courtyard was a gazebo where Takumi often had tea with Sakura. When they were young, their mother frequently joined them as well, bringing snacks that she'd swiped from the kitchens or made on her own just for them. That was before King Sumeragi was murdered and she became queen, though.

This was the first time Takumi had come into the garden to see the gazebo absent of both Mikoto and Sakura.

He passed around the gazebo and instead sat on one the benches that lined the courtyard pathways. After a beat, Niles sat next to him.

Takumi fixed his gaze on the evergreen bushes in front of him and tried to "relax," as Niles had so insistently entreated him to do, but he couldn't bring himself to let go of his sour mood and buzzing thoughts. And when he glanced over he saw that Niles was staring at him, gaze bright with curiosity. He seemed about as eager to continue their conversation as Takumi was to leave it as it was.

"The flowers are that way," Takumi said flatly, jerking a thumb towards the courtyard.

"I've found that seeing that peeved expression of yours tends to bring about the same sense of gratification," Niles replied.

"Eurgh," Takumi groaned, ignoring the heat that crept up his neck.

Niles's stare didn't waver, and eventually Takumi found himself giving in. There was really no harm, he supposed. What was Niles going to do, go running back to Nohr to tell everyone there all about his crippling insecurities? At the very least, Takumi imagined their snotty Prince Leo would have a ball with that.

He took in a long breath, smelling fresh dirt and the last traces of this season's sweet-scented osmanthus blooms. He let it out in a deep sigh.

"Ryoma and Hinoka were born with all the talent," Takumi said. "They've proven themselves capable and worthy of their stations many times over now, so it makes sense that no one trusts me with anything. I haven't done anything to earn anyone's respect or faith."

There was a slight pause before Niles answered. The warm breeze ruffled his outlaw's cloak. "Don't you think that's because you haven't had the opportunity to prove yourself yet?"

Takumi looked down at the ground and kicked his foot at a fallen leaf. For some reason, he couldn't bring himself to look at Niles in that moment. "What's there to prove at this point? Anything I could contribute, they would be able to as well, and probably be a lot better at it, too."

"You don't believe that," said Niles. "You wouldn't be working so hard every day if you did."

Takumi's mouth turned down into a scowl. "What do you know?" he scoffed.  _ Outsider, stranger, interloper. _ Of all people, Niles was the one who least had the right to claim anything about Takumi.

Yet Niles didn't falter as he turned to Takumi and said, "I know I chose to put myself in your service when I could have remained under your brother's command instead."

"What?" Takumi said, brow furrowing. "Ryoma assigned you to me."

"Only after I asked him to," said Niles.

"Why would you do that? You practically demoted yourself."

Niles shrugged. "Well, it was a matter of boredom at first. I am good at sneaking about and collecting information, but I'm a soldier, too. To be honest, I was starting to miss the thrill of battle."

"You could have just asked Ryoma to repurpose you as one of his soldiers. Hinoka is the commander of an entire platoon."

At that, Niles grinned, the corner of his single blue eye crinkling. "My prince, hasn't anyone ever told you? No one in this army fights like you do."

If it was meant to be a compliment, it certainly didn't feel like one. Takumi swallowed a strange lump in his throat. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Surely it hasn't escaped your notice that you're the most skilled archer in the army by far," said Niles. "What's more, it certainly hasn't escaped mine that you always aim straight for heart in every battle. You fight to kill, My Lord--and frankly, it's quite stimulating."

The phrase made Takumi's stomach drop. "I do  _ not _ fight for the sake of killing."

"That’s not what I meant to imply, but it’s also a fact that not a single soldier who challenged you in battle at the border came out of it alive," said Niles.

"I wasn't  _ trying _ to--I was just fighting like I always do," Takumi sputtered. "I was defending my kingdom. Sparing lives was the last thing on my mind."

"And that's exactly what makes it such a delight to fight by your side," said Niles.

"What, so you chose me because you think I'm a bloodthirsty freak like you?" Takumi said. "Gee, thanks."

And in that moment, something strange happened--the smile on Niles's face turned into something soft and almost nostalgic. "That part of you reminded me of someone I was close to...back in Nohr."

Takumi's lip curled. "Trust me, I'm probably nothing like them," he said, turning away to avoid Niles's gaze once again. "You should have gone home while you had the chance, during the battle at the border."

"I won't lie, I was tempted to."

Takumi's eyes widened. Niles had never been anything but absolutely loyal since the day they’d met. He hadn't expected to hear such a confession.

"Then why didn't you?" Takumi couldn't help but ask.

"Hm." Niles seemed to fall into deep thought for a moment, folding his arms and tapping his foot a couple of times. "That day I took that attack for you, and then again when I nearly lost my life to that poison...you saved me both times."

"I've already explained that to you," said Takumi.

"I know," said Niles. "But if Prince Ryoma had been in the same position, had been as suspicious of me as you were at the time, would he have done the same?"

Takumi's mouth twisted in a grimace as he turned to glare at Niles. "What do you mean by that?"

"I served him for a year," said Niles. "I've seen the decisions he's had to make to ensure the safety of the kingdom. To put it simply...he doesn't take risks."

"Ryoma is the High Prince," said Takumi. "He can't afford to take any risks."

"But you can, because you're the second prince. And you do," retorted Niles. "You decided to risk everything by trusting me and letting me stay by your side."

Takumi pursed his lips. "So what?" he muttered.

Niles reached out and tilted Takumi's chin up to hold his gaze before the other could look away. Takumi's first instinct was recoil from the touch, but there was something about the heat in Niles's stare that made him too tense to move. Distantly, he felt his pulse quicken.

"That's how I know I chose right," was all Niles said before he leaned forward and pressed his mouth to Takumi's.

Takumi froze, mind going blank as he struggled to comprehend what was happening. Heat flushed in his cheeks as Niles snaked an arm around his shoulders and pulled him in closer before tilting his head to deepen the kiss.

Takumi scrambled to react--but just as he managed to muster the coordination to push Niles away, a sharp pain against the side of his neck made him flinch.

"Ah--" Takumi gasped as he pulled away, reaching up to touch his neck. The flesh there was already starting to swell, and the realization came too late.

The ground lurched beneath him and he pitched forward, unable to stop himself from falling bonelessly into Niles's waiting arms. His head spun, and his limbs were no longer listening to him. A sudden, profound rage stung his eyes with hot tears.

"Traitor," he whispered, jaw heavy and tongue prickling with the taste of Niles's lips as everything faded to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope i'll be able to get chapter three up by the time takumi's birthday rolls around...in the meantime, thanks for reading!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just in time for takumi's birthday ;v; this is more of an intermission than a real chapter, though. just a glimpse of niles's pov, mostly bc i have a lot of fun writing niles tbh lolol...enjoy!

In the two years Niles had been gone, Nohr hadn't changed much.

This in itself wasn't surprising, of course. Niles was no one. His absence had very little effect on the lives of most people in the kingdom. Still, he couldn't help but appreciate the familiar scent of cool concrete and candle wax as he opened his eye and found himself standing in a familiar room.

Prince Leo sat before him, legs crossed and elbows propped against the armrests of his plush armchair. He looked down his nose at Niles for a moment, as if to confirm that it was him, before moving his gaze to the bundle that lay on the ground beside him.

"When you told me a few days ago that I would be preparing a warping spell for two people, this was not the ‘partner’ I imagined you bringing," Leo drawled, eyes sharp with distaste.

Niles glanced down.

Prince Takumi was still unconscious, breathing softly and evenly as if in deep sleep. His expression was more peaceful than Niles had ever seen it. His silver hair, having fallen out of its tie during the warp, was splayed out over Leo's rug in a way that reminded Niles of a spider's web. Niles resisted the urge to reach out and take a strand of it in his hand.

"Consider him a gift," he said. "I couldn't come back to you empty-handed, after all."

Leo wrinkled his nose like he smelled something foul. "I asked you to bring me information on the Hoshidan army's movements and weaknesses, not their bratty prince."

Niles chuckled. "Rest assured. That I have for you, as well, My Lord."

"Then give it here, already," Leo demanded, holding his hand out and making an impatient gesture.

Niles reached into his supply pouch and pulled out a thick envelope. "Together with the reports I've been sending over the past two years, this should make a complete index of the Hoshidan army's weaknesses and formation patterns, as well as some information and speculation regarding their future movements."

"Excellent work, Niles," said Leo, taking the envelope and tucking it away in a drawer without opening it.

Niles knew Leo planned on delivering the reports personally to Xander later, most likely in the hopes that Xander would be open to reviewing them together. Absently, Niles wondered how mad Leo would be if he were to tell him how similar he was to Takumi.

Leo sniffed. "So? What am I supposed to do with _him?_ " he asked, nudging a booted toe against Takumi's shoulder.

It was only for the briefest of moments, but Niles had the fleeting impulse to smack Leo's foot away. Silently, he berated himself. Takumi was no longer his liege--he never was.

Niles cleared his throat. "Whatever you want," he replied. "As I said, he is my gift to you."

"Hm." Leo stared down at Takumi for a second before his eyes brightened, and he reached out and lifted his sacred tome from his desk.

Niles's stomach flipped as he watched Brynhildr glow with magic.

"I suppose it wouldn't hurt to nip this particular nuisance in the bud while I have the chance," Leo said, and he raised his tome.

"Wait!" Niles blurted before he could stop himself.

Leo jumped slightly at the interruption, snapping Brynhildr closed and cutting off the spell. He scowled down at Niles.

"Didn't you say I was free to do as I pleased?"

Niles swallowed, throat dry. "I did," he admitted, speaking slowly as his mind raced. "But before you make any hasty decisions, my prince, might I make a suggestion?"

Leo cocked an eyebrow. "Fine. What do you think I should do with him?"

"I know you don't like spilling blood unless it's absolutely necessary," said Niles. "You don't have to kill Prince Takumi to get him out of the way."

Leo's hand twitched against the cover of his tome. He could be merciless when he needed to be, but Niles knew he was not a cruel person.

"Go on," Leo said.

"Right now, Prince Ryoma and Princess Sakura are both missing, and Princess Hinoka has been charged with protecting the castle. Assuming anyone's even noticed he's gone, no one will be able to do anything about it. It will be easy to just keep him prisoner for a while, at least until our army has ensured our victory over the Hoshidan forces," said Niles. "If anything, he'll serve as a good bargaining chip if the opportunity ever arises."

Leo tapped his fingers against his chin as he considered Niles's suggestion (Takumi was a restless thinker as well, only he tended to tug on the end of his ponytail).

“You have a point,” Leo relented after a short moment.

"But...?" Niles prompted.

"If we keep him here in the castle, Father will find out eventually. He'll most likely want to execute him to make an example of him to the Hoshidan army," Leo said. "I won't be able to protect him if it comes to that, and I doubt Xander will, either."

"Well--what about the northern fortress, where Princess Corrin used to live?"

If the mention of Corrin struck a nerve with Leo, he did an admirable job of concealing it. "That won't work. All of the soldiers who work there answer to my father."

"Then..." Niles scrambled for ideas, but his mind came up blank. He looked down again at Takumi, who slept on. What had he even brought him here for?

"What about Izumo?" Leo said suddenly.

Niles blinked up at him. "My Lord?"

"Izumo is neutral territory. If we keep Prince Takumi contained there, Hoshido's army won't be able to enter to retrieve him," Leo explained. "All we'll need is a small group to sneak him in and then act as his guard."

Niles didn't notice the small sigh of relief that escaped his lips. "That sounds perfect," he said, lips curving into a smile.

"Mm. He'll also be perfectly safe there, so there won't be any need for you to worry about his wellbeing, either," Leo continued airily.

Niles blanched at that. "I suppose so, yes,” he said carefully, trying to keep his expression even.

Leo let out a long-suffering sigh. "I know it's been a while since you’ve been home, Niles, but please don't tell me you've forgotten--you can't hide anything from me."

Niles cleared his throat again, this time a little more forcefully than he'd meant to. "My Lord--"

"Don't bother," said Leo, raising a hand. "I wasn't expecting this from you, Niles, but it's no longer relevant either way. You came back to Nohr in the end, and that's what matters."

Cold sweat gathered in the palms of Niles’s hands as he lowered his head in a small bow. "You honor me with your mercy."

"Oh, please, there's no need to be so dramatic. It happens all the time," said Leo. "Our spies leave the kingdom: some come back, some get discovered and don't come back. Others get attached and choose not to come back."

Knowing it was the smart thing to do, Niles kept his mouth clamped shut regarding which one of those categories he believed he belonged in, if any.

"Anyway, I'll be handpicking the group that will take Prince Takumi to Izumo. Shall I assign you to the task as well?" Leo asked.

Niles looked up to stare at Leo. The other's expression was carefully blank, but Niles caught on easily enough.

"I think I would rather stay here," Niles said. "My duty is to you, after all."

Leo nodded in approval. His gaze darted towards Takumi, and a scowl furrowed his brow. "I suppose I can't blame you for getting attached to some members of the royal family after spending so much time with them. In fact, you could have fallen in love for all I care. But I still have one warning for you."

Leo narrowed his eyes as his grip tightened fractionally around Brynhildr.

"Never forget where you true loyalties lie, servant of Nohr."

-:-

It was good to be home. This, Niles could say with confidence as the next several weeks came to pass.

Yet somehow, he’d found early on that adapting to his old lifestyle and surroundings turned out to be a little more difficult than he'd imagined it would.

It was so cold in Castle Krakenburg, whereas in Hoshido he had gotten used to waking up to warm sunlight streaming through his window even during the winter. The castle's thick oak and steel doors were heavy against hands that had grown familiar with the lightweight sliding doors in Hoshido, and he had never noticed just how dim the daytime hours in ever-overcast Nohr were until now.

Of course, these were all changes that he eventually adjusted to anyway. When all was said and done, they were minor details in the grand scheme of things.

But there was one thing he still couldn’t get used to.

If anything, it seemed to be getting increasingly difficult for him, seeing Leo every time he lifted his head from a bow when there was still a part of him expecting to see Takumi.

More and more, Niles was starting to see the same face appear in his mind's eye at the most inopportune of times, and consequently he found himself turning the same phrase over and over in his head like a mantra: _Not my liege._

Guilt was not an unfamiliar sensation to him. Niles could count the number of things he'd done that he _didn't_ regret or feel guilty about on one hand. But he prided himself on being able to ignore such feelings when he needed to, because there was no room for such pointless ruminations when one had long ago dedicated one’s life to serving the Nohrian royal family.

Yet his thoughts were constantly wandering back towards Takumi, wondering if he was all right in Izumo, if the agents Leo had assigned to the task of his detainment (imprisonment) were doing what they ought to.

He wondered if he would ever get the chance to ask Takumi for his forgiveness--not that he deserved it.

And sometimes, when it was late and Niles was exhausted from the day's work (for there was much to be done on everyone's part over the course of conquering a neighboring country through war), he would lie in bed and stare up at the concrete ceiling and wonder if he would ever get to see Takumi's smile again.

And then inevitably, he would remember Leo's words ( _Others get attached and choose not to come back._ ) and remind himself with some measure of indignation that he had, in fact, come back, and that must provide some testament to the certainty that he had not gotten attached, because that was just not something Niles did.

So, he would then ask himself, why couldn't he stop thinking about Takumi?

-:-

It was only four weeks after he'd returned to Nohr that Niles woke up one day to come face to face with the opportunity to find the answers to the questions that had been haunting him.

It was still early in the morning when Niles stepped out of his room to see Leo's second retainer, Odin, walking briskly down the hall with a troubled expression on his face.

"Well, well." Niles fell into step beside Odin, grinning when the other shot him an irritated glare. "Someone's in a rush."

"I have a message to deliver to Lord Leo," Odin answered curtly.

Niles raised his eyebrows at the lack of theatrics and flowery speech in Odin's reply. It was rare to see him out of character. Niles had to admit, though Odin had only just come under Leo’s service when Niles left, he had missed him a little, if only because he was hilarious to be around. Usually.

"Did something happen?" Niles had to ask.

Odin didn't respond this time, instead stopping abruptly and turning to rap his knuckles against Leo's door.

"Enter," Leo called from inside, and Odin and Niles stepped into the room and lowered themselves at their liege's feet.

Leo ignored them for several seconds as he finished reading something from the old, worn text he held in his hands before placing it down on his desk and looking down at them with one eyebrow cocked.

"This is the first time I've ever seen the two of you enter the same room quietly," he remarked.

"Urgent news, My Lord," Odin said without preamble, eyes fixed on the floor. "There's been some movement among the castle troops."

The entire room fell silent, as if all three of them were holding their breaths.

"Did you see their commander?" Leo asked quietly after a moment's pause.

"It was Zola, the court mage," said Odin.

"Ugh, that worm," hissed Leo. He had never liked Zola, not that anyone had any reason to. The man was despicable, and that meant something coming from Niles.

"The command wasn't carried out by Prince Xander," said Odin.

"Of course it wasn't. He would have told me," said Leo. "Where are they headed? Do you know?"

"I didn't hear Zola issue any orders directly, but there were murmurs about Izumo."

Niles felt his blood run cold. "What?" he barked before he could stop himself. "They're going to _Izumo?_ "

Odin shot Niles an irritated glance before looking up at Leo. "My Lord?"

Leo clicked his tongue. "I knew it. That cretin Iago is planning something behind our backs."

"My Lord, if Zola discovers Prince Takumi there, he'll report it to the King," said Niles, heart in his throat.

"That's not the only problem we're looking at here," said Leo. "Izumo may be neutral territory, but they have an army of their own, with soldiers whose skill in magic outmatch those of both Nohr and Hoshido by far. If Zola manages to provoke Izumo into entering the war, chaos will ensue."

"Is that what you believe he's trying to do?" Odin asked.

Leo kneaded his knuckles against his forehead. "I don't know what in gods' name he's trying to do, but we can't just sit here and let it happen. If we want to ensure a swift victory over Hoshido, we need to prevent any involvement from other territories, even if it means defying Father's orders. I'll ask him for his forgiveness after I've won this war for us."

"Then...?" Niles prompted, trying not to let his impatience show.

"I suppose we'll have no choice but to go and discern Zola's intentions for ourselves," Leo conceded.

"A quest, then!" Odin burst out without warning, making both Niles and Leo jump. He sprang to his feet, clutching his cloak and tossing it with a flourish. "A treacherous journey that will take Nohr's lionhearted second prince and his two most trusted followers to--"

"It'll take me a while to wheedle my way out of the castle with Father," Leo said, raising his voice to speak over Odin. "Be ready to depart within the next few hours."

Niles bowed his head and, not waiting for Odin to finish his monologue, turned and walked swiftly out of the room.

Dead or alive, he was going to see Takumi one last time.

 

To his credit, there was no way Leo could have predicted that Corrin would turn up in Izumo, and with her own little army, no less.

Odin was the one to suggest joining the fray between the two armies to put an end to the fighting before it garnered any attention from the Archduke, but Niles's first instinct was to avoid the fighting altogether and head straight for the palace to sort things out with the Archduke himself.

And because Niles's idea was the smarter of the two and Leo was a smart man, the three of them were soon sneaking their way into the palace through a small entrance they’d discovered along the wall of the palace’s the west wing.

"Not a single guard in sight," Leo muttered as they slipped inside effortlessly.

"The Archduke certainly takes his role as a peacemaker seriously," Niles agreed.

"It is a testament to his hubris," Odin declared. "The Archduke is sure to regret his decision when we--"

"We are _not_ here to fight the Archduke," Leo hissed.

Odin fell silent at the reminder. "Mm. My mistake, then."

Niles snickered. "Someone's thirsty for action today."

"Hush," Leo snapped, holding a hand up and pausing in his steps. "Did you hear that?"

Niles tightened his grip on his bow and turned his ear in the direction Leo was indicating.

Footsteps, firm and measured. Soldiers on patrol.

"Maybe the Archduke has guards after all," suggested Odin as the three of them closed in with cautious, discreet steps, stopping just short of the corridor ahead.

"No, that's Nohrian armor clanking about," said Leo. He raised Brynhildr, whispered a quiet incantation, and sent a spell sailing around the corner.

Niles counted silently in his head. _Three...two...one..._

The spell activated with a sharp sound that cut through the air, followed by a chorus of surprised shouts that quickly turned into groans of agony and finished with the crunch of bones breaking and flesh being rent.

Niles breathed in and smelled crisp bark, ash, and the sweet, metallic tang of blood. He smiled and strolled into the corridor.

If there was one thing he'd found all Hoshidans had in common during his time there, it was that they were always bound by their honor, above all else. They didn't lie, they didn't steal from one another, and they didn't attack opponents who couldn't fight back.

Niles, on the other hand, made a living out of doing all three of those, and usually all at the same time on good days.

The first arrow went through the throat of a Nohrian mage who’d been too busy trying to pry a gnarled tree branch out of his leg to notice Niles before it was too late.

"Settle down, now. You're going to be just fine," Niles murmured into the soldier's ear. The soldier let out a choked gasp as blood spilled from his neck, and Niles leaned down to lift the other's supply pack from his belt.

"Quit wasting time, Niles," Leo said, walking ahead of him with his tome glowing in his hand to finish what he'd started. "No survivors. We can't afford to leave any witnesses in case this goes awry."

"Yes, My Lord," Niles and Odin answered in unison, lifting their weapons.

From there, it was only a matter of following the trail of Zola's soldiers before it brought them to a set of large mahogany sliding doors deep in the heart of the castle.

Niles put his ear to the door. He listened for a moment, then pulled away and shook his head at Leo. There were no sounds coming from within.

Leo gave them a silent signal. Weapons at the ready, nonetheless. He reached forward with a hand, Brynhildr held open in the other, and threw the door open.

Niles dashed into the room, arrow notched--

"Don't attack!" Leo ordered, eyes wide as he stepped into the room. Slowly, he closed his tome and dropped it into its holster.

They were standing at the entrance of a giant ball room. The air was warm and hummed with a strange, unfamiliar type of magical energy that made Niles’s skin prickle. Silk curtains hung from the walls, dyed in vibrant, painfully dazzling colors, and long, polished tables lined the impeccably waxed floorboards.

Hundreds of Izumo soldiers were seated at the tables, their arms bound and mouths gagged with rope. Upon seeing Leo and his retainers, many of them started struggling against their bindings, letting out muffled shouts from behind their gags.

"We're not going to hurt you," Leo said, signaling at Niles and Odin to stow their weapons. The prince swept his gaze across the sea of captors, eyes intent, and immediately Niles and Odin fanned out to assist in the search.

Niles walked briskly up and down the tables, gaze darting over each captive, hoping for a glimpse of amber eyes, pale hair--

"Lord Leo!" Odin called from the other side of the ballroom.

Niles turned to see Odin kneel down and lift an unconscious individual in his arms. Long white tresses spilled to the floor, and his heart jumped to his throat--

No, that wasn't the right color. It wasn't Takumi.

There was no doubt that the person was no mere soldier, however. As Niles and Leo met Odin at the front of the ballroom, they quickly came to the realization of who they were dealing with.

"This must be Archduke Izana," said Leo, taking in the divine mark on the individual’s forehead.

"Is he all right?" Niles asked.

The Archduke's complexion appeared to be rather pale, and he didn’t stir as Odin laid him down gently.

"At the very least, he lives," said Odin solemnly.

"He won't be waking up anytime soon. Those soldiers of yours hit him pretty hard when they stormed the palace."

The voice was so strikingly familiar Niles didn't give himself time to fully place it before he was whipping his head around in a reflexive response.

"Prince Takumi." It was Leo who spoke first, sounding somewhat surprised in a distinctly unhappy way. "So you're still alive, after all."

And gods, so he was. Takumi sat a mere few paces away, bound from the waist up just like the rest of the captives, but in the place of a gag in his mouth was a big, dark bruise that lined his jaw. It wasn’t hard to guess that he'd resisted when they'd tried to gag him. His hair was a mess as well, spilling down his shoulders in bunches and knots, and his clothes were stained with dirt and torn in several places.

But he was alive and he was here, and in that moment it took everything Niles had not to fall to his knees in front of him.

Takumi shot Leo a nasty look, lip curling briefly into a sneer, before turning to fix Niles with a cold stare.

"So it wasn't enough for you to betray the Hoshidan army and kidnap me, was it?" he asked, and Niles was sure he was the only one who could notice the minute tremble in Takumi's voice. "You had to bring me here to personally watch you drag the people of Izumo into your war, as well."

Niles's breath caught in his throat. _He's all right_ , he told himself like he couldn't bring himself to believe it otherwise. _He's okay._ He then opened his mouth and replied with the only thing he could think of.

"Prince Takumi, how could I have betrayed you when I was never one of you in the first place?"

The color drained from Takumi's face. For a second, Niles thought he felt the temperature in the entire room drop.

Then, Takumi's cheeks flushed red. He jumped to his feet, teeth bared, and lunged towards Niles with an enraged snarl.

Suddenly, a blinding light flashed between them, forcing Niles to turn away. There was a yelp and a heavy _thud_ , and when the light receded Niles saw that Takumi fallen back onto his knees, a magical rune glowing against his chest.

Takumi let out a frustrated growl and struggled against the binding spell, but it held fast.

"I don't have time for this," huffed Leo, lowering his hand. "We'll consider it a small victory that the Archduke is--mostly fine, but we still have a bug to squash. Farewell, Prince Takumi. Let's hope for you sake this is the last time we meet."

"I'm going to kill you," Takumi ground out through his teeth, eyes gleaming with malice.

Leo didn't bother to reply, instead turning to stroll out of the ballroom with Odin at his heel. He didn't seem to care that Niles didn’t to follow right away.

"You know, I think that's the first time he's ever let someone off after being threatened," Niles remarked.

"I wasn't talking to him."

Niles opened his mouth and closed it again, finding himself at a loss for words at the moment. Then, he huffed out a quiet laugh. "And here I was thinking all this time about how excited I was to see you again, My Lord."

"I was hoping we would get to meet again, too," said Takumi with striking sincerity. "It's a pity I don't have my bow on me at the moment, but there's always next time."

Niles grinned at that, heart flipping with something eerily close to delight. "Trying to scare me, my prince?"

"I don't want you to be scared. I want you to be ready," said Takumi. "When I get out of here, I'm going to find you, and I want you to look me in the eye with what little dignity you have left as a human being when I put an arrow in your chest."

Niles barely contained the shiver that ran up his spine. "Is that a promise?"

"It's a certainty. You sealed your own fate on the day you made your false vow of loyalty to me."

"I'll be holding you to that then, Prince Takumi," said Niles, and he turned and walked away without once looking back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for anyone whose memories of rev storyline are fuzzy: in chapter 8 yukimura claims that takumi was kidnapped by nohrian soldiers, and the next time we see him is in izumo, so i took that and ran with it :) thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, it's been a while, and i dont actually have an excuse, but im back and that's what matters, because now here's a new chapter for all 3 of you who have been waiting on the edges of your seats. enjoy!

Takumi stared down into the Bottomless Canyon.

There was a strange sense of deja vu, like he couldn't shake off the feeling that he'd been here before, stood in this spot, felt the bridge beneath his feet give way to send him hurtling down into the void--

Memories from another lifetime, perhaps, or maybe just a product of his own overactive imagination.

Nevertheless, there was one image that remained, clearer now in front of him than it had been in his mind a month ago.

There was no mistake. This was where he had been standing in the vision the Throne of the First Dragons had shown him.

He glanced up, looking out over the bridge. Ryoma and Prince Xander had been the first to jump without a shred of hesitation, disappearing into the black space in a matter of seconds. The rest of the army hung back, watching.

Takumi turned to look at Oboro and Hinata, who stood at his side. Hinata gave him a thumbsup; Oboro managed a tight smile.

Sakura stood behind him, gripping her staff tightly. She looked terrified, face pale and arms trembling against her sides. But Takumi knew that as soon as he jumped, she would follow.

From his other side came the sound of hooves shuffling. Prince Leo glanced down to meet Takumi's gaze from atop his dark mount, and let out a distinctly impatient huff.

Takumi's lip curled.  _ If you're in such a rush, then you can jump first. _

He kept his gaze carefully trained away from the individual standing next to Leo. The anger that simmered beneath his skin at the mere thought of him still stung like a fresh cut, but at the moment there was something else pulling him away, drawing him back towards the great rift below him.

It was a familiar pull, if only because he had felt it in the vision all those weeks ago, like a voice in his head telling him,

_ This was fated to happen. _

And as he had done so that day in his mind, he stared down into the abyss, braced himself on his knees, and jumped.

 

For the first few weeks, simply ignoring the problem actually seemed to work.

In the first place, they were all so busy struggling to get their bearings in a strange, foreign world while at the same time fighting off an army of brainwashed undead soldiers that nobody really had the time to see anyone else except in passing or when they happened to be near each other during battle.

For a while, Takumi let himself believe that Niles had never even existed.

But like all good things, so did this brief reprieve come to an end one crisp afternoon, after a reconnaissance mission gone slightly awry.

Takumi stomped his way across the castle grounds, walking swiftly with his hand clenched around the Fujin Yumi. Corrin hurried to keep up, her footsteps so light he wouldn't have noticed her if she wasn't so persistently badgering him.

"Takumi--"

"Back off!"

"No, listen to me!" Corrin clamped a hand on Takumi's shoulder, stopping him forcefully, and spun him around.

His vision blurred with whiplash for a second. He could never get over how strong Corrin was. 

"I chose you two to come with me because it was ideal for the mission, that's all," she said.

"That's a lie and you know it," Takumi shot back.

"What happened back there was an accident! You can't blame him for it."

Takumi clenched his jaw so hard it ached as he pulled it open to reply. "I'm not blaming anyone."

"Then why are you so angry?"

" _ I"m not angry! _ "

Corrin took a half-step back, eyes wide.

Takumi's stomach sank. He swallowed hard, throat stinging, and kneaded his knuckles against his forehead. "I'm sorry for yelling. I'm not angry at you, Corrin."

"I know," said Corrin sadly. "But I don't want you to be angry at yourself, either."

Despite himself, a dry laugh squeezed its way past Takumi's lips. "Are you ever going to stop asking the impossible of me?"

Corrin's smile was gentle as she wordlessly held her hand out in a silent truce. 

Takumi hesitated for a moment, tempted to simply walk away like he would have before, before giving in with a sigh and taking it instead. He let her lead him across the castle grounds, towards a small patch of grass near the sakura tree glades. They shared this place as a regular hideout, when they needed time to be alone, and when they happened to run into each other here they would sit together. The silence that they shared in this space was a comfortable one, but sometimes they talked, too--about Hoshido and Nohr, about each other, about themselves. 

Corrin sat down and patted the space in front of her. Takumi settled into the grass, back faced to her, and felt some tension leave his shoulders as Corrin undid his hair tie and started running her fingers through his hair, pulling apart knots and weaving small braids. Takumi stared up towards the sky as Corrin worked. 

"I must have been a terrible person in my past life," he said softly, eyes trailing across the blue expanse. The sky in the astral plane was always clear.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" Corrin asked.

"It's a Hoshidan belief," said Takumi. "Your actions in one lifetime affect your fate in the next. If you lead a virtuous life, fate favors you. If you're evil, you suffer the consequences when you're reborn."

Corrin’s hands stopped moving, and she pulled them away. "Takumi..."

"I have these dreams where I'm always hurting everyone around me. You're there every time--sometimes you look different or you have a different name, but it's you." Takumi glanced back towards her, but didn't dare to look her in the eye. "I think it's evidence enough that they're dreams of my past lives."

"That can't be true," Corrin said, placing a warm hand against his back.

"Mother is dead, and every time I come to trust someone, they turn their back on me. If that isn't fate's punishment for me, then what else could it possibly be?"

"Don't say that!" Corrin moved to kneel in front of him, reaching out to take his face in her hands. "I’ve let you down once, I know--but I came back, and you gave me a second chance. Don't you think you deserve the chance to forgive him as well?" 

Takumi pulled out of Corrin's grip and rubbed at his eyes. Gods, he was so exhausted. "I don't deserve anything, and he doesn't need my forgiveness."

"Takumi--"

"It doesn't matter what I think anyway, as long as you trust him. You're always right in the end."

"What? I've never said that," said Corrin, eyes bright with distress. She always acted like it was the end of the world whenever Takumi disagreed with her on something.

"I'm tired," Takumi said, rising to his feet. "I'm going to get some rest."

At the very least, Corrin knew when he was no longer interested in continuing a conversation. "All right," she conceded. "Take care of yourself, okay?"

Takumi turned without replying and continued on to the barracks, feeling the exhaustion settle deeper into his bones with every step.

_ Just until the end of this war _ , he reminded himself as the Fujin Yumi grew increasingly heavy against his back.  _ And then I’ll never have to see him again. _

 

Takumi preferred being in the armory long after the sun had set, after all of the other soldiers had already gone to bed.

It wasn't that he didn't enjoy being around the others; he just preferred to be alone when he was working on the Fujin Yumi because it required more focus than other weapons did. The Fujin Yumi was a fickle weapon: sometimes it behaved perfectly well during fine-tuning, and other times it lashed out at him whenever he made a mistake, shocking him with a burst of energy that rattled his teeth and sometimes even left burns on his hands, although those always healed quickly.

Ryoma had told Takumi once that he had that in common with the Fujin Yumi. Takumi had snapped at him that he was speaking nonsense and that the it was just a weapon. And after that, he hadn't been able to lift it for over a week.

Today, too, it was giving him attitude. Every time his hand slipped or he couldn't fix something right it would pulse with a sharp heat in his hands, as if prompting him to focus.

"I  _ am _ focusing," Takumi growled down at it when it let out a burst of energy that stung him so hard he nearly dropped it. His hands were starting to grow numb--he wouldn't be able to keep working like this.

With a weary sigh, he set the Fujin Yumi down on the bench beside him and dropped his head into his hands. The skin on the palms of his hands was hot against his cheeks.

"Just a little longer," he whispered to himself. Somewhere along the way, it had turned into a sort of mantra for him.

"Until what?"

Takumi sprang to his feet, stumbling as he looked up with wide eyes. And standing there just a few feet away, as if he still believed he had the right, was the last person in the world Takumi wanted to see. 

"What are  _ you _ doing here?” he demanded. 

Niles wore a sad smile that looked too carefully crafted to be real. "Good evening," he said.

Immediately, Takumi turned on his heel, scooped the Fujin Yumi up, and started walking away.

"Takumi, wait--"

"You have no right to address me so casually," Takumi growled between his teeth, quickening his pace as he heard Niles follow.

"My Lord," Niles tried.

Takumi ignored him again, gripping the Fujin Yumi tightly in his hand as he burst out of the armory and made his way towards the barracks. It was heavy in his hand, weighing down on his entire arm like it was straining to escape him. He gritted his teeth and clenched his fingers hard around it until they ached. 

When Niles put a hand on his shoulder, he reacted immediately.

Takumi spun on his heel, raised his bow, and leveled an energized arrow right in between Niles's eyes.

Niles threw his hands up, mouth falling open soundlessly.

"How  _ dare _ you touch me," Takumi snarled, drawing the arrow further until he felt the strain from the pull reach all the way to his back.

"Wait," Niles said softly, gaze beseeching. "Please, I just wanted to apologize for what happened today."

"Nothing happened today. We went on a mission, there was a skirmish, we got out," Takumi said, not lowering his bow. His arms were starting to tremble.

"It was my fault you took that hit from the Faceless. If I hadn't been--"

"Just stop!" Takumi dropped his arms, the energy in Fujin Yumi dissipating. It grew heavy again, and Takumi was briefly tempted to just let it fall to the ground. He was so tired, he wondered if he would follow. 

"Look,” he said. “I don't blame you for that, or anything else, okay? So just...leave me alone."

Niles stared at Takumi for a second, not moving. Then, he said, "That's not true."

Again with the baseless assumptions. Old habits died hard. "You don't know anything about me," Takumi growled. 

"I know that if I begged your forgiveness now, you wouldn't hesitate to refuse."

_ So you couldn't be bothered to at least try?  _ Takumi swallowed around the lump in his throat. "You don't need my forgiveness."

"Maybe not, but I want you to know: since the day you saved my life, I wanted to tell you who I was. I wanted to tell you everything."

Takumi scoffed, contempt taking the edge off of his initial disbelief. "And what would that have accomplished?"

"If I'd thought there was even the slightest chance that you would still accept me as your retainer after knowing, I would have defected to the Hoshidan army without a second thought just to be by your side."

Takumi's chest tightened--and at the same time, his heart sank with profound disappointment.

"Is Prince Leo aware of what a disloyal, traitorous scumbag you are?" Takumi asked.

Niles's voice seemed to catch in his throat. "I..."

"I won't go blabbing about it to him. I know that was a lie." Takumi gave Niles a dry smile. "You were just saying what you thought I wanted to hear."

Niles's eye went wide. "Takumi--"

" _ Stop _ saying my name." Takumi fought against the heaviness settling on his shoulders and sighed softly. "Why are you trying so hard?"

"Because I need you," Niles said with such certainty that even he looked a little surprised.

A moment passed. The air between them sat thick in Takumi’s lungs. 

He resisted the urge to hold his breath, and hoped the tremor in his voice wasn't too obvious as he asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Niles looked lost, the color draining from his face, and he didn’t reply. 

For a second, Takumi almost felt bad for him. But the moment passed quickly as he came back to his senses.

"We'll be at Castle Gyges tomorrow," Takumi said, and this time his voice came out even. "This war will be over soon, and then you’ll be able to stop pretending you feel guilty about what you did. You won’t have to worry about me ever again."

Something like realization flashed across Niles’s expression as he met Takumi’s gaze. “Is that you’ve been telling yourself?” 

Takumi pursed his lips and straightened his back despite his heavy shoulders. "What other choice do I have?" he replied. When he saw that Niles couldn't come up with a reply, he hefted the Fujin Yumi in his grip, turned, and walked away.

This time, Niles didn't follow.

 

Takumi stared down at the small figure on the board in front of him. Black ceramic was sculpted and sanded into the smooth, defined edges of a horse's bust. Silly, awkward-looking animals. They didn't even have horns.

"Are you trying to find a way to blame your imminent loss on the pieces being ugly again?"  asked Leo from the other side of the board.

"No," Takumi snapped.  _ I just forgot how to move the knight again, that's all.  _ "They are ugly, though," he said under his breath.

Leo reached across the board. "Here."

Takumi snatched the piece away. "I don't need your help!" He lifted it, stared at the board for a second without really comprehending anything, and set the piece down in what his instinct told him was probably a good position.

With barely a glance towards the board, Leo made a move Takumi didn't understand and announced, "Check."

"What?" said Takumi, squinting at the pieces. "How?"

"There." Leo pointed. "I'll have your king in the next move no matter what you do."

"No way. There's got to be a way to counter," said Takumi.

"There isn't. The game is designed so that--"

Takumi flapped his hand impatiently. "Just let me think."

Leo rolled his eyes and conceded, leaning back in his seat and waiting as Takumi glared down at the board and reminded himself of what each piece did.

It was already obvious to him that Leo was going to win anyway, but at least this time he could say he didn't go down without a fight.

"Takumi, have you been bullying my retainer?"

Takumi's focus broke and he looked up with a frown. "Have I been  _ what? _ "

"Niles has been sulking since yesterday. He won't tell me anything, but I know you two were out doing reconnaissance on Castle Gyges with Corrin. Did you say something to him?"

Takumi's mood immediately soured. "Nothing I shouldn't have told him a long time ago," he replied.

"Hm,” Leo said, then shrugged. “Fair enough. He'll get over it eventually."

"Yeah, well, if that’s how easy it is for him then that makes one of us," huffed Takumi.

Leo cocked an eyebrow, gaze vibrant with curiosity and perhaps a touch of amusement. "Why aren't you as angry with me as you are with him? He was acting under my orders, after all."

Takumi scowled. His new friendship with Leo had grown out of a great number of agonizingly awkward interactions and considerable effort on both their parts. He’d been hoping all this time that this would never come up, if only because it reminded him of how much he despised Leo at the beginning of the war. 

"I  _ was _ mad at you," he admitted. "But you're not the one who made a move on me before stabbing me in the neck with a syringe full of sleeping drought and kidnapping me to Izumo."

Leo had the grace to pause and look a little embarrassed about that. "Right. I didn't tell him to do...any of that."

"No, I imagine not. He just thought it would be fun to shatter that one minuscule fragment of respect I still had for him at that point."

Leo went quiet for a second before he replied. "You know, I was going to kill you when he first brought you to Krakenburg."

For all that it was his first time hearing this, it didn't faze Takumi in the least. He'd seen how fierce Leo could be towards enemy soldiers.

"What made you change your mind?" he asked. 

"Niles practically begged me to spare you--keep you safe, even. I sent you to Izumo because it was neutral territory. At the time, we were unaware of Iago's schemes and thought there would be no fighting in Izumo," said Leo. "This probably isn't very pleasant for you to hear at the moment, but he's actually very attached to you."

Leo was right. It  _ was _ unpleasant to hear, given how hard it was to believe. Takumi's stomach turned with an unfamiliar feeling. "He still betrayed me in the end."

"Mm. I wouldn't forgive him, either," Leo admitted, and the ease with which he said it struck Takumi as odd. He couldn’t even fathom the possibility that Oboro or Hinata would ever turn their backs on him.

"Doesn't it make you nervous? That it's so easy for him to just turn on people."

"Niles isn't necessarily disloyal by nature," said Leo. "He's just a coward, that's all."

"And you trust him with your life?"

"That's not a problem. He fears me far more than he fears anything else in this gods-forsaken world," said Leo with a casual wave of his hand.

"Oh," said Takumi. At least in this respect, he could somewhat understand the way Niles's mind worked. "Well, maybe I could have just intimidated him into not ruining everything, then."

At that, Leo hid a soft chuckle behind his hand.

Takumi bristled. "What?" he demanded. "I can be scary!"

"I know. I've seen you fight," said Leo. "I just don't think you've ever given Niles any reason to be afraid of you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Leo shook his head and looked back down at the board. "Have you found a way out yet? If not, it's my win again."

Takumi clicked his tongue and flicked his own king piece over. "We're playing shogi next time."

"But I've only just started teaching you," said Leo. "To your credit, you're actually learning very quickly. At this rate, we'll be playing to draws in no time. You might even get a lucky win over me every once in a while."

"Then I guess that’ll be at least one thing in my life that's going right," Takumi muttered.

Leo merely smiled at that and started resetting the pieces on the board.

"If you can last more than nine turns this game, I'll owe you lunch once we get home," said Leo.

Takumi set his jaw. "I'll beat you this game."

Leo threw his head back and laughed. "If  _ that _ happens, I'll eat my tome."

 

_ There was something painfully familiar about the sensation of the arrow slipping from his fingers, leaping from the bowstring and flying straighter and more true than it ever had before. _

_ Mikoto let out a soft gasp as the arrow struck her in the heart, its brilliant blue light glowing fiercely against the white of her robes, vivid against the pale skin of her cheeks. _

_ She looked at Takumi as she fell, eyes bright. _

_ "Don't be afraid," she whispered to him in a voice only he could hear. _

_ "This was fated to happen." _

 

It was the cold that woke Takumi.

He wrapped his arms around himself and tried to calm the wracking shivers that ran over his body, but it was when a sharp breeze raised the scent of fresh grass and damp dirt around him that his eyes sprang open and he registered he was not in his futon.

Takumi pushed himself up, eyes wide and darting about through the dark before a brief shimmer of something bright drew his gaze to the left.

He was lying beside the castle's ore spring.

A brief wave of panic overtook him--the last time he'd fallen asleep in one place and woken up elsewhere had not exactly turned out to be an ideal scenario for him. But the realization of what had happened came to him quickly as he brought his thoughts back to order.

Takumi hadn't sleepwalked in years now, but he probably should have seen this coming. It tended to happen on nights when his dreams were particularly horrible.

_ It is your body trying to run away from the things you are seeing in your mind,  _ Queen Mikoto had told him once before.  _ It's all right to be afraid now, but someday you will be brave enough to stop running away. _

Her words had stayed with Takumi, always echoing in his mind to combat the stinging disappointment he felt in himself every time he woke curled up in the castle halls. But he'd known from the start that it wasn't Mikoto's words that had comforted him that night, made him feel safe--it was her presence.

Now that she was gone, what was the use in clinging to the mere ghost of her?

Memories of the battle in Gyges sat heavy and cluttered in his mind and burned fresh tears at the corners of his eyes. To see her again, standing there in front of him looking alive and well, and to have that brief moment where he dared to let himself hope--

Only to watch her die again and yet again be unable to do anything about it--

Takumi took in a sharp breath as his chest constricted painfully, hot tears spilling down his cheeks. He hadn't even gotten the chance to say all the things he wanted to tell her. There had barely been enough time to say goodbye.

He scrubbed at his cheeks, trying to gather himself, but his breathe was already breaking into short, choked gasps. The air around him was quiet and still, and as he sat there at the ore spring for what felt like hours, the only sound in his ears was his own pitiful sobbing.

 

"It's nothing but good luck coming your way today, darling."

Takumi blinked and looked up from the battle report he'd been reading. Well--more like skimming tiredly. He'd barely absorbed any of it.

"Orochi," he said after taking a moment to register the diviner standing in front of him. "What was that?"

Orochi wore a beaming smile as she waved the small fan in her hand, sending lilac-scented air ghosting over Takumi and his papers. "Oh, just a little something I read in the cards this morning. I've been using it as a conversation starter with some of the soldiers in the army lately. It really breaks the ice!"

Takumi nodded slowly. "Okay...did you need something?"

"Well, I do believe it's rather you who needs something, my prince," said Orochi. "What's this I've been hearing about a certain nasty nighttime habit returning?"

Takumi's expression twisted into a grimace. "Could you maybe have said that with better wording?"

At that, Orochi merely let out a fluttering laugh and tapped her fan against her chin. "It's not a good habit to have, young prince, especially in the middle of a war. You could wake up one evening and find yourself with no way to get back to us!"

"It's not a big deal, Orochi. It's only happened once," said Takumi. He frowned. "Who even told you about it, anyway?"

Orochi rolled her eyes and, without being invited, perched herself atop Takumi's desk. "No one had to tell me about it. I just know things. It's kind of my job, you know."

"All right, then," muttered Takumi, trying to pull his battle report out from underneath Orochi and failing.

"I've got just the thing for you, my dear. Some quick charms and--poof! You'll go back to sleeping like a baby every night." With that, Orochi whipped out a handful of talismans.

"I never sleep like a baby." Takumi scrubbed at his tired eyes. "You know that stuff doesn’t work for me anyway, Orochi."

Orochi went quiet. The talismans rustled softly as she placed them on the desk and pulled Takumi's hands away from his face. As he looked up, she brushed his bangs back gently, like Mikoto used to do. "They're only dreams, Takumi."

"Do your dreams chase you out of your bed?" Takumi retorted.

"You don't have to let them. Running away is only a single choice amongst infinite others."

For a bizarre moment, Takumi's thoughts wandered towards Niles. "What else can I do?" he said, not sure what he was asking about anymore.

"You could turn around," said Orochi, picking up one of the talismans and placing it gently in his hand, "and face it."

Takumi looked down.

_ Fortitude _ , the single character on the talisman read in swaying Hoshidan calligraphy. He ran a finger over the ink and immediately a warm, steady strength rushed through him.

He looked up back up at Orochi, who smiled at him.

"All you need to do is hold onto that every night and you'll be just fine," said Orochi.

"I thought these were only supposed to be used in battle," said Takumi.

"Everyone fights different kinds of battles." Orochi leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Takumi's forehead. "Your mother's greatest regret was to see you grow up as more of a soldier than a prince, but when she saw you that day, I could tell she was proud to see that you've come to fill both roles very nicely now."

Takumi's chest ached to hear Orochi of all people speak of Mikoto. "I could have saved her if I was stronger."

"We can't save everyone. That's not the same as not being able to save anyone," said Orochi. Her smile turned sad. "It's not much, but you still have us, Takumi."

Gripping the talisman tightly, Takumi rose from his seat to pull Orochi into a hug. Orochi laid her head against Takumi's shoulder. She smelled of ink and the wildflower meadows near Castle Shirasagi, where she and Mikoto used to take him out to play when he was little.

"It's enough," he said.


End file.
